Kerry Lynn Grozinger recently applied to be a Big Sister in our match program. While going through the enrollment process, she was asked to write an article for her church. We are very excited to share Kerry Lynn's perspective with you regarding her decision to become a Big Sister.

"What I am about to undertake in becoming a Big Sister is really causing me to become quite eager in anticipation - eager to meet my new Little Sister.  It feels almost like being pregnant and wondering what your new child will be like once you meet her.  But also a bit nervous, wondering what if she doesn't bond with me or relate to me well?  What if her parent or guardians don't approve of me?  What if she acts out or misbehaves and I don't handle it well enough?  Many uncertainties and unknowns at this point.  However, I am reassured by the fact that Big Brothers Big Sisters Ottawa (BBBSO) goes through quite an exhaustive assessment and matching process to ensure that both Big and Little Sisters are well suited toward each other with the objective of building a long term relationship.

I wondered could I ever be brave enough to do something so scary and life altering such as be a Big Sister?  We had sponsored a little girl through World Vision who was the same age as Katrina, my daughter, named Nandini, who lives across the world in Sri Lanka.  But I wanted to do something more, something where I could actively take a role in someone's day to day life.  So I guess that's how I came to the idea of a becoming a Big Sister.  I started the process this past May by completing the arduous 10 page application form, complete with three references. (This application form has since been revised to only 4 pages.) All three references were contacted by the organization, one of which was my pastor, Anthony Bailey, my own Mother and my best friend and CA colleague. 

Once I had passed the initial application phase, I was called in July to schedule my appointment with an Enrollment Coordinator.  I was quite nervous but also excited.  The meeting gives the organization a chance to learn about my personality and strengths to best match me to the right Little (that's what they affectionately call the Little Sisters and Brothers). At the end of the meeting, I was given the opportunity to complete a checklist to indicate any characteristics of a potential Little that I would be uncomfortable with to aid in the matching process.  For instance, a Little with a handicap, a different religion or culture from you, homosexual parent(s), parent with a boy/girlfriend, etc. etc.  I decided not to check off many of these "complexities" as I figured that with most of them, perhaps they would benefit more by having a different role model in a Big Sister.  I decided that in order to let fate determine my match I wouldn't put too many qualifications in the way!

After that stage I was asked to attend their mandatory 2 hour training session in August which outlines the goals and objectives of the Big/Little Sister relationship as well as safety rules and guidelines to protect both parties.  I also had to submit an application for a Police Check (which is still outstanding apparently because of an administrative backlog with Ottawa Police Service).  It is recommended in the first year to schedule weekly visits with your Little for between 2 to 4 hours.  This is important to build trust and reliability and security with an adult who is (hopefully) important in their lives, something they may not have on a consistent basis.  Low or no-cost, simple outings are the preferred choice.  The emphasis is on spending quality one on one time building the relationship and ultimately their self-esteem. 

The research upon which Big Sisters/Big Brothers bases their program is that if a Little can develop self-esteem (something they may not have the opportunity to have in their current home environment for whatever reason) there is a remarkably higher chance of succeeding in life and becoming a well-adjusted adult.  This fact alone solidified my determination to continue on this journey.  I was suffering from self-doubts as to whether I'd be too soft-touch to handle the tough life situations I might face by being exposed to a very different childhood from the one I was fortunate enough to have had.  Maybe I'm being too vain to think I could make such a difference in someone's life so as to transform it into being a life filled with more acceptance, more love, support and encouragement such that she could achieve her life's goals?  But this is the one thing that propels me forward to take on this challenge, the desire to make a BIG difference in someone's life who wasn't afforded many of life's luxuries and opportunities as I was so fortunate to have been blessed with in my loving family."